December 4

“…Do you believe that I can do this?”

 – Matthew 9:28

Today’s Gospel reading tells of Christ’s miraculous healing of two blind men. While far from his first miracle, Christ approaches the pleading blind men and humbly asks, “Do you believe that I can do this?” On one hand, Christ seems to be testing the faith of these men. On the other, however, he appears vulnerable and openly doubting his abilities to help these men. Through their faith and trust in Jesus, the blind men are healed “according to their faith.”

I have often found myself doubting my talents and abilities. As a first-year administrator at a Catholic High School, I remember my first presentation to the school’s board. It was awful. As the youngest person on the leadership team, I projected my own insecurities about my experience onto the strangers in the room. I stumbled over my words and let my self-doubt take over. After my train-wreck of a presentation, the board chair pulled me aside and said, “I fully trust you and we need your help. We are glad you are here.” My internal demons immediately vanished through this act of kindness.

I believe today’s Gospel is as much about the trust of the blind men as it is about Christ’s own self-doubt in a perceived moment of weakness. Trust is built through vulnerability. During those moments when I do not trust myself as much as I should, I am reassured by the shared vulnerability of the blindmen and Christ. By trusting others, we recognize the divinity that they may not be able to see in themselves.

All-knowing God, allow me to believe in myself and others this day, as you believe in me.

Amen.

Benjamin Horgan

To view the full Advent 2020 booklet, click here.

To download an online copy of the full booklet to your computer, click here.